Take a first step and not the last.

I know what most people think. Blended family is just when kids have two sets of parents that simply tolerate each other for their kids. This is by far the most ridiculous concept. Yes, some blendeds must start that way but that should be the first step not the last.

My blended family began shaken and stirred. There was tension surrounding every decision and every step. The kids were young enough at the time to not understand this entirely though they felt it. I was hesitant to do things with my own flesh and blood (FNB) child simply because I thought someone would look at it and wonder why I wasn’t doing it with my kids from love not genetics (LNG). I was always wondering what other people thought. I also had this fear of balance… am I loving LNG too much or not enough. Ultimately, this took away from what all of my kids experienced. I hesitated rather than lived in the moment. I wanted everything to work out and to be this fairytale blended family but didn’t know how to get there. I have always had respect for their mother and felt I did not measure up to the mother that she is and was scared that she knew it. You may start asking yourself, how on earth did this change? What’s the secret?

Let me just say, things happen on God’s time. We just have to trust in him and know that it’s okay to be at a point of confusion or live in the unknown of what’s to come. The important thing is to know that God is at work and to trust in him.

So, let’s fast forward a bit. God had a plan and through him, my spouse and I found our way. My LNG’s mom and stepdad also found their way to God. It was as if God took two different vehicles that were running away from each other, down opposite sides of the highway and slowly guided them along to the same path without any traffic or detours. We found a bond that is hard to explain, but through time I hope to give everyone an understanding of this Splendidly Blended Family of mine.

Don’t give up on what can be. Don’t listen to others tell you that blended families cannot work. Listen to God and seek his guidance in all things and you will find your way. You could even be like me and have found the most unexpectedly amazing friend that no one can seem to comprehend, the mother of my LNGs.